Category — Life and everything else

As with any masterpiece it took a lot of pain and sweat to manufacture it – but it was worth every minute of the hard months of sickness and the difficult birth! Daniel Lian is such a joy! He is a calm and charming little fellow who doesn’t keep us up all night. Although right now he seems a bit jealous of the laptop, as he would rather sit on my lap! He is now 2 weeks old (being born on the 24th of February) and doing really well.

Now my next task is to take part in the Poem a Day-Challenge in April. Hopefully there will be more on my mind than finding a rhyme on diaper – viper? Piper? Hyper? Oh dear…

… and gaining a new one!

Much has changed over the last weeks. One of the biggest changes is our wedding last weekend, which was the most perfect day. See for yourself how happy we are!

I also assumed the name of my husband “Stüber”, but will keep my old name for writing as the new one is a bit of a challenge for non-Germans.
The other even more challenging but wonderful thing going on is my pregnancy. After the Hyperemesis I am now suffering from “Gestational diabetes”, which means I have to check my blood sugar 7 times (!!!) a day and take insulin in the middle of the night and in the morning. I have never seen so many docs and taken so much medicine before! But the little one is healthy and happy! I just had a 3D ultrasound – doesn’t he look all relaxed?

Unfortunately all this affected my ability to write a lot - well for the moment. I am sure that I will be able to use all these new experiences in my writing and gain new depth in it…

First of all: what is that? That was my reaction when I was told I was suffering a mild form of Hyperemesis gravidarum when I went to hospital for 5 days in the third month of my pregnancy (now being in the 5th). In the first three months of a pregnancy many women face morning sickness (which actually can come over you all day or in the night). But if the vomitting is more often during the day and you can’t even drink water without keeping it in then it is more serious. This is what happened to me and why I decided to go to hospital. There I was “fed” with medicine and liquid intravenously so I was able to regain my strength at least a little bit. But the vomitting and sickness came back a few weeks afterwards! So after a short period of being shocked I started to get informed about this illness and got myself (and the baby) the treatment I needed. Still I am not really well and still I am loosing weight - all in all nearly 12 kilo since the beginning of the pregnancy! But now that I know what is going on I feel mentally better and hopefully I can help others to survive this nasty experience.

1) Most important: Get informed!
The more you read and understand about Hyperemesis gravidarum the better for you and the better you know what treatment you might need. Sometimes doctors simply don’t see it as such a big problem - hey, they haven’t had the experience of being so weak that you can’t get up from the bathroom floor after vomiting!! Try to find an online forum or even a local group!!
A very good website is: http://www.hyperemesis.org/ to start with research.

2) Don’t let anybody tell you it’s a mental thing!
There are scientist (strangely enough more often men then women) who makes their case that Hyperemesis gravidarum is a mental thing and the women concerned are unhappy with their pregnancy/life/family/partnership/husband and whatever else you can think of. In my case I can clearly state: I am neither of all above! This is a sickness related to the pregnancy and whatever cause it might have (bacteria, inhertiance etc) IT IS NOT A PSYCHOLOGICAL PROBLEM!!

3) Reduce stress and fear
Having said it is not a psychological problem doesn’t mean it can’t evoke exactly those. During the weeks when I didn’t know what is going on with me I was scared, sad and didn’t know how to survive the next day and get on with life and the pregnancy - not very typical for me!! In the really worst case Hyperemesis gravidarum can lead to depression and even abortion or suicide. So if you follow 1) and 2) the next step you can take is: reduce your stress and fear! Normally the fetus doesn’t suffer as much as we women do (although no long term studies have been conducted) so the chances are really good for your unborn child. Try to get as much rest as you can! I even take a nap for about 15 minutes down on the office floor after lunch. My boss is aware of me feeling much better after that. And if you can’t do all the things you wanted to do before birth - don’t worry. You and the child are now the most important, everything else has to wait.

4) Seek help
Try getting help not only from doctors, but also midwives. Tell your friends what is going on with you and be patient with those who keep telling you this sickness should be over soon or those who think a hot cup of fresh ginger tea would help. And never forget to thank your partner/hubbie… for his help and support! My fiancé even cooks for me to make sure I eat healthy enough, I will be thankful for the rest of my life for everything he does for me during these difficult times. And he knows that!

5) Eating
For me eating is still a huge problem. Even though I take a pill every morning against the sickness I might end up vomiting in the evening. My lactose intolerance has become much worse so that even the faintest traces of milk or lactose in the food can cause another seizure. I also learned the hard way that tomatoes and pumpkin is nothing I should eat now - both I normally really love … Gee, I hate to think of my Halloween party! My point is: listen to your body, it does tell you what you can and what you shouldn’t eat. Right now I scuff marzipan - almonds have a lot of Calcium!

6) Never forget: this will be over!
It took me a couple of weeks to come to grips with the fact that the Hyperemesis gravidarum might stay till the birth of my child - in the worst case. It might end earlier; it might end in the labor room. Another 5 months seem like an awful long time, but: it will be over! And after that you will be rewarded with the greatest wonder on earth: your newborn child!

So: don’t give up! You are not alone with this!!

And after all this I will go back to writing…

How I wished I could go to London right now! From Friday on a medieval alphabet book containing 46 leaves of parchment will be on display at the British Library. This book is a fantastic display of the workshop’s skill and must have been either something to show customers or a pattern manual for the craftsman. Read more and especially see 10 pictures of this amazing piece of art here: http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2009/jul/28/medieval-alphabet-book-britain

Today is his 150th birthday – as I am a big Sherlock Holmes-fan (and working for “The British Shop”) I will treat myself with reading one or two short stories tonight. I am just not sure which one to pick, there are so many!

1. My lover, darling, best friend (all in one) -  to chat with him through the night and to cuddle with him in the morning.
2. The song “Wire to wire” by Razor Light (yup, after all these weeks I still turn the volume up on my radio!)
3. Writing poems, even though I feel rather leached out after the Poem a Day challenge. And of course writing in general…
4. My guinea pigs as they gave me a reason to open my heart again in my darkest times and for making my laugh on a daily basis! Guys, you are hilarious!
5. “Isolde”, my harp, who (!) sometimes can be a bitch but most of the times lets me play wonderful music.
6. Osteopathy: a weird but wonderful medical treatment and after 2 sessions I already feel soooo much better! Ever had your liver pushed around??
7. The new Star Trek movie! I always loved Spock in the classic series when I was a kid but Zachary Quinto blew me away. I was skeptical as I thought I would keep seeing him as Sylar from Heroes (where he was awesome, too!) but I completely forgot about that character. He really does look like Spock. I have to watch it in English to hear his real voice…
8. While I am at it: re-watching the classic series. Just got myself the first half of season one and can’t stop watching it. I am in total regression, cuddled in a nice blanket – but no, I am not sucking my thumb!
9. Reading books I normally wouldn’t read. I am in the middle of “Heart of the Night” by Barbara Delinsky – pure romance, but well written (more thoughts about that later). The next book I will read is “Three Men in a Boat” by Jerome K. Jerome – another book not typical for me but it sounded fun and I really want to broaden my literary horizon.
10. The internet – so much information on my hands, I could browse for days!

You may have heard about the collapsed building in Cologne. The historic archive, a 4-storey building collapsed this afternoon, at least 3 people are still missing. More about the story at the CNN-webpage.

I had been right there at the end of December 07, so this is a bit spooky for me… Here is the Google map:

Größere Kartenansicht

But what I really want to write about is, how much getting information or news has changed for me. Normally I would have just read a local webpage while I was at work and then watch the news on TV. But today I first read about it at twitter, and then switched on iTunes to listen to a local radio station, reading the local webpage plus following SamZidat on twitter who lives nearby and provides pictures taken on his balcony. SamZidat has the most recent news, but obviously he can’t provide interviews or further background knowledge the way TV/radio can do. So instead of relaying only on TV or radio in a very passive way I actively collect and select the information I want from the different sources (not to forget Google maps!).

Is this the new age of communication? And how do we learn and teach this much needed “Medienkompetenz” (media competence)??

Let us pray for the rescue of the people who might still be in the building and hope that as many historical documents as possible can be saved after the rescue mission.

What a weekend! Full of masks, traffic jams only consisting of pedestrians and of course the magic of Venice. Sunday morning we went to the “Flight of the Angel” at St. Marcus Square - with the whole group of 31 costumes! People actually thought we were the official parade and we were filmed be the “Deutsche Welle” (watch it here in English, starting at 0:00:50 time stamp).

After this we escaped from the too-well-known and far-too-packed square to another one nearby where this picture of me and my boyfriend was taken (guess who is who!!). We had enough space to present our costumes, here you find more pictures at Carnevale di Venezia Bonn.

Later in the evening my friend and I decided to go back to St. Marcus Square, this time I was wearing the costume of my aunt. We made a great show with kissing and cuddling, so a Japanese tourist was quite enchanted by us; she just kept staring at us with a little smile on her face while the others of her party didn’t stop taking pictures. It is wonderful to see people captivated by these wonderful costumes and I hope we will be back in Venice next year…